Like a Skin

"Like A Skin"- Sara Groves

The butterfly can just look back
Flap those wings and say, oh, yeah
I never have to be a worm again

The snake gets tired of being him
He wriggles from that itchy skin
Leaves it lying where he's been and moves on

I've been longing for something tangible
Some kind of proof that there's been change in me

Feels like I have been waking up
Only to fight with the same old stuff
Change is slow and it fills me with such doubt

Come on, new man, where have you been?
Help me wriggle from this self I'm in
And leave it like a skin upon the ground 


You may wonder, "What do song lyrics and a picture of a tree have to do with health and creativity and living a life of RESTORED JOY?"
I am putting a bit of my personal life up here and sharing some insights that I am learning as I myself seek for the Lord to restore my joy....so just grin and humor me:)
 
A friend opened my eyes to the lyrical world of Sara Groves and I have been consumed for the last week listening to her powerful lyrics that speak nothing but TRUTH and LIFE!  I may share more soon, but for now, this song hit me and while on a prayer walk (one of the best ways I pray) I came across this tree and just smiled.  This tree, along with Sara's examples, show PROOF that there is change happening in this season of life.  

Sometimes I feel that I am not changing. Stuck. Frozen. Numb. Confused. Unmotivated. Lost. I feel that too many things in life are the same: Same job, same weight, same home, same fears, same prayers, same hard situation.....where is this hope and where is this change that I am praying for and trusting that God will come through??????

I want to SEE the change. I want to SEE the movement in the midst of the season that I am in and I too, much like this butterfly, want to look back at my "old self" and flap my wings knowing and FEELING that I am free to move forward!

Where do you turn when you feel stuck? My immediate reaction is to grab the phone, call a parent or a friend. Talk it out with my husband or just try to "plow forward" with my own ideas. I confess, I pray and pray and then if I don't see movement after a while, I start seeking other help. Don't we all? Waiting isn't natural to us anymore and we want to see instant changes, instant gratification and instant results!

So what is a girl and a believer to do in the midst of trial or hard seasons when you feel stagnant, unchanged  and ready to fly? She is to wait and to pray and to have hope in God's word. Hope in the scripture and truth that it holds. Truth that God is always at work and it may be this season or many many more changing of seasons until I visibly can SEE the harvest....but I know it will come. I hope that it will come and I put my steps of trust into that.  Maybe my body isn't ready just yet to release that skin b/c I am not protected enough without it?  God knows what the road looks like ahead and I for sure want my wings as strong as they can be for this next season.

So for now.....I may feel like a worm or that itchy snake......but I cannot wait to fly and be free again.  God, thank you for the waiting. Thank you for making me strong in the trials of this season and for helping my wings get stronger so that I am ready to fly!
I wait.
In my heavenly Father I trust.